


Pretend it isn't talking

by cuikune



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-04
Updated: 2012-09-04
Packaged: 2017-11-13 13:23:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/503978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cuikune/pseuds/cuikune
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They were so very, very dead if anyone found out about this. And knowing Xander's life, they would.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pretend it isn't talking

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Burningchaos](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Burningchaos/gifts).



> Uh, so, those of you familiar with the Anita Blake and/or Dragon Age fandoms will recognize two references in this fic. I just stole some lore, so you don't have to worry if you don't know them.

They were so dead of anyone found out about this.

 

“We are so dead if anyone finds out about this,” Xander says, tangled in sweat soaked sheets, the almost warmth of another body all along his side.

 

“Ya, I’m trying not to think about that, actually,” Angel says, hands clenched in the sheet that he has pulled up to his neck, which is funny because Xander saw the full monty not long before _shoving Angel’s shirt roughly aside, popping the buttons in his haste to get to skin, Angel shrugging out of his shirt gracefully as he placed open, biting kisses on Xander’s mouth and neck, the two of them tumbling back on to the bed_.

 

“Oh, how is that going, then?” Xander asks, staring blankly at the ceiling of the crypt, and oh god, he had sex in a crypt. With a _vampire_. A _male_ vampire, and oh god _Angel pinning him down on the bed with his legs and hips and hands, biting Xander’s neck, the barest hint of teeth, and the sensation sends sparks down Xander’s spine, causing him to arch into Angel_ how had this happened, exactly?

 

“Not so good,” Angel says, clutching the sheet tighter and pulling it just a little higher, because apparently two century old vampires are modest. Who knew?

 

“How did this happen?” Xander asks desperately.

 

“Hormones,” Angel tells him, sounding just as desperate.

 

“Yes, hormones,” Xander starts, then, “wait, you’re dead and also over two hundred, you don’t have hormones!”

 

“No, but _you_ do, and I can smell them,” and isn’t that nice, Angel can smell his hormones. Wait…

 

“Is that why demons and bugs and _vampires_ keep trying to eat me?” Xander demands, turning over to face Angel.

 

Angel looks guilty, which is an answer in and of itself. “Hate you. So much,” Xander says.

 

“I should go,” Angel says, not looking at him.

 

“Your crypt, _I_ should go,” Xander says, because he really has to get out of here. He still isn’t sure how this happened, but he’s pretty sure he doesn’t want it to happen again. He thinks.

 

_Angel above and inside of him, balls deep, one hand braced against the bed next to Xander’s hip and the other wrapped around Xander’s cock, and it feels so good that Xander sobs with it._

 

“Fuck my _life_ , why do vampires not come with a warning label about what happens when you let them bite you during sex?” Xander mutters. His words startle Angel into looking at him.

 

“Flashbacks?” Angel says, and really, Xander doesn’t think ‘flashbacks’ is the proper word for what’s happening to him. “I’m sorry.”

 

Sorry isn’t really what Xander wants to hear. He wants to hear that there is a way to _make it go away_ , but it’s not like this was planned, and it’s really not like Angel could have known Xander would offer up a vein the heat of the moment…Ok, maybe sorry was fine.

 

“More like, full sensory videos that I’m starring in. This must be what virtual reality feels like,” Xander says. He pauses. “I should really, really go.”

 

Angel looks like he’s going to say something, half opening his mouth before he changes his mind. “We should both go, actually. Help Buffy with patrol.”

 

“Yes. Yes, we should do that,” Xander says, nodding. Oh god, Buffy. How can he face her knowing that he and her sort of boyfriend had sex? Oh _god_. And Oz would be there. Oh _god_.

 

“Are you ok?” Angel asks, concern in his voice.

 

“I’m panicking. How are you not panicking, we’re going to see Buffy. And _Oz_ ,” Xander says.

 

Angel’s eyes widen. “We should shower,” he says, and Xander agrees, he really does.

 

“Do you have a shower?” Xander asks, because seriously. They need to get the scent of sex off of them if they’re going to be around Oz. Boy has a nose on him like…well, like a wolf.

 

This was all so very, very bad.

 

-

 

They were so very, very dead. He should have remembered Faith. The girl was creepy good at all things sex, and had known the very second they showed up what had happened. It was scary. And also a disaster.

 

Buffy was doing her kicked puppy impression and Giles was giving him and Angel disproving looks and seriously, this is not his fault! Really. Honest.

 

No one believes him. He isn’t sure he believes himself.

 

“Why is everyone blaming me?” he asks no one, because everyone is talking at Angel. “I mean, I’m seventeen. He’s like, two hundred.”

 

Except Angel was apparently paying attention, because he winces and turns to Xander. “It really is my fault.”

 

“Really?” Xander asks hopefully. If it’s Angel’s fault, that means that no one will yell at him. Then he realizes what Angel said. “Wait, really?”

 

Angel nods. “I had a run in with a desire demon last night.” He sounds embarrassed.

 

“Oh dear,” Giles says, polishing his glasses.

 

“It’s fine though,” Angel said quickly. “I didn’t actually hurt Xander and I didn’t bind him to me-”

 

“Bind him to you?” Buffy demands, abandoning her puppy impression. “You _bit_ him?!”

 

“Uh,” Xander hazards. He squirms when everyone looks at him. “That part actually is my fault.”

 

Faith is the first one to react. She laughs.

 

“I knew there was a reason I liked you,” she tells him.

 

“Because I’m stupid?”

 

“No,” she said with a grin, running her finger down his cheek. “Because you’re demon catnip.”

 

“You say that like it’s a good thing,” Xander says gloomily. Faith’s grin widens and she gives him and Angel a speculating look as everyone goes back to yelling, at both of them this time.

 

In the back of his mind, a small voice that Xander pretends doesn’t exist says that it was totally worth the trouble.

 


End file.
